Tuesday, November 2

Me vs. Coffee - an Epic Battle

Jimbo Slice told me that by the end of college, I would pick up a coffee habit. He was wrong. Then he said when I start working, I would pick up a coffee habit. He was still wrong. This time, I thought grad school would surely do me in and I'd be chugging espresso like it's Patron in Vegas. I am wrong. Although the need for an energy boost definitely exists, my experiments with coffee consumption have failed me.

I have 2 night classes after work and I ritually nod off or struggle to keep awake at work, during the first class, and again during the second class. Any of you who are in grad school know its not like undergraduate lectures where nodding off is passable. Since I have a midterm tonight, I feel it's appropriate to address this coffee war.

The latte: It failed horribly. It tasted like death, as all coffee does in my opinion. And the milk upset my stomach. I'm not lactose intolerant but probably getting there. I can drink a cup of whole milk or eat ice cream or cheese and be fine, but whatever evil they put in coffee ALWAYS forces a run to the bathroom. I still felt sleepy during class but the caffeine kicked in later at home and I couldn't sleep. Latte = NO!

The white chocolate mocha from Starbucks: This tastes much more pleasant because it mostly tastes like white chocolate and its on ice. Yay, do we have a winner? No, because after the initial joy of flavor, I make a run for the bathroom and I still fall asleep in class. White Chocolate Mocha = NO!

The energy drink: I've had Red Bull before and it tastes alright but not great. While browsing Target, I decided to try their Archer Farm brand raspberry energy drink. It's really gross. Don't drink it. Since I couldn't get through enough of the energy drink to see if its effective, I can't comment on whether it works. Energy drinks are chock full of bad things for you anyway so = NO!

The Hot Chocolate: Not bad. Tastes better than coffee. The sugar kept me awake. But the milk still made me interrupt class for frequent bathroom trips.

The WINNER: Hot Chocolate with soy milk. It's not the tastiest, but I've solved all the above problems. I found Joy with Soy =)

Any coffee haters out there understand me? How do you keep awake when getting the full 8 hrs of sleep just isn't an option?


  1. I'm not a big coffee drinker, but I do like the Caramel Macchiatos from Starbucks!

  2. when i feel like i'm gonna lose the battle, I make sure nothing is propped up. i.e. my back is not touching the seat, my head is not propped up by my hands, I'm not even propping my elbows onto my knees (I've fallen asleep like that before). Also, shaking your head gives you an extra minute of consciousness as you start to lose it. Sounds silly but it worked for me in college

  3. @TP, I've tried all of the above. They work but only temporarily. There's only so much head shaking I can do in 75 minutes that won't make me look crazy.

  4. does tea work? or milk tea (which may give you the runs too). i think it's the coffee + milk or tea + milk combo that doesn't work well for people's stummies. just learn to drink coffee black! hah.

  5. @BigApple, yeah there was a time when I enjoyed the Caramel Macchiato too. A time before I got food poisoning in college which changed the course of my dining experiences. =(

    @sherbear, I don't feel the affects of tea at all. Though it does taste better. And yes, you're right. It's the combo of milk + other drink. Coffee black? NEVER!!!



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